Bullying at work

It’s been a while since I last wrote. Life has been happening and each time I have promised myself I would update my blog. I am glad today I finally got a chance. The good news is that having been away for so long,  I have a lot to write about. I am really excited about this and look forward to the next coming days. 

This page is inspired by my own experience as a wife and mother who also happens to be career loving. I know there are many out there just like me.

Today I would like to talk about the subject of bullying in the work place. It’s unbelievable that this happens in a set up where there are adults who should know better.  One would think this was a junior school phenomenon. Well it’s not and today I would like to share some tips on handling this.

Unlike in primary school where the bully took your sandwich or removed and broke your “nerdy” glasses, in the work place it is sometimes so suttle and one might not necessarily see it that way. The best way to define bullying is that it is use of unwanted force, threats, aggression and belittling of others. Usually it is those in power that bully those with lessor ” perceived” power. However it can also be done by subordinates or  collegues at the same level.

Usually in such cases the usual response is either fight or flight. There is no necessarily a better response of the two. It simply depends on the circumstances. My own personal response would be to fight,  and here I don’t mean physical fighting. In current circumstances at least in our part of the world, leaving might not be an option. I have a suggestion that could help in dealing with and fighting bullying at work.

Depending on who the bully is,  the first option could be to approach them in the presence of a superior that you would have briefed already,  and let the bully know the effect of their actions on your person and how this impacts the organisation. It is always better to refer to specific incidents of the bullying so that the bully is reminded of them. The next step is to get acknowledgement and a commitment to change from the bully. Normally taking that step of facing the bully is a sign of boldness on your part and I encourage you to try it despite your hatred for confrontation and discomfort and having such a conversation.

In some instances the bully is a superior and in this case you would need to identify a person who is at the same level as the bully to be part of your discussion with the bully.

If you notice bullying behaviour in your organisation, do not bury your head in the sand and pretend not to notice. Whether as the line manager or a collegue , it is important to deal with bullying in the work place.

I hope that you are not one of those who are being bullied and if you recognise yourself as treating your colleagues with disrespect, belittling their suggestions and being aggressive,  please stop.

Until my next blog, enjoy your journey and see you at the top.

Journey Mercies!

Madame Boss

Published by Mum in Stilettos

I started blogging when i became a mother. I was struggling to manage the demands of being a working mom and being present for my baby's key development milestones. Initially this was a rant about my experiences in the office and at home. Over the years it has evolved into an online support community for mothers who are growing their families as they grow their careers. I am a wife and mum to 3 amazing children. The girl who introduced me the "mother" title is 8 years ol and our twins are five years, 6 months. During the day I am have a job i love as marketer for a multinational FMCG company. When i get home, I have another equally rewarding job called being a mother. When everyone is tucked in bed, I find time to blog about my journey as a mum in stilettos and build this community for us working moms so we can thrive at home and at work.

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